Lesson 15 Journal Entry

*** ***** Drive

Fairbanks, Alaska 99701

 December 5, 2011

 SFC Shed Winston

* **. *-** **, *-** ****
*** ********
APO, AE *****

 Dear SFC Winston:

 Thank you very much for the encouragement that you have shown me as I have worked to complete my education. Your insight and advice has helped me immensely in completing English F111X.

 With your constant praise and insight, I have graded well in every lesson and completed all of my journal entries for my newfound blog. Your support while you were home for your Rest and Relaxation was very helpful. You made it possible for me to focus as I started my first set of lessons. You accomplished this by watching the kids, running errands, and doing housework. Your support helped me find my rhythm so I would be able to continue on with my schooling once your leave ended.

 After you left to go back to your unit and finish your deployment, I was still able to focus on my work because of the praise and encouragement that you sent over the phone and internet. With this support I have made remarkable progress in my writing. I have used the inspirations of being an Army wife and the lessons that the both of us have learned in my essays and blogs. Your praise and reassurances have helped me boost my confidence and I have graded no less than an A on each assignment, including my research paper. 

 My gratitude will never be expressed enough to you. I know that I am extremely fortunate to have you as such a supportive and understanding husband. I hope that I continue to make you proud in my future accomplishments.

 Sincerely yours,

Tania Winston

 Tania Winston 

                                                Tania Winston
                                                *** ***** Drive
                                                Fairbanks, Ak 99701
                                                ***-***-****
                                                tdwinston@alaska.edu

Objective                                To report on my current accomplishments and future writing goals

Academic Writing Experience

Fall 2011                                 Introduction to Academic Writing, ENG F111X

·         “All You Need is Patience”: 500+ word essay describing a personal strength

·         “Average vs. Social Class”: 750+ word essay contrasting “I Just Wanna Be Average” by Mike Rose and “From Social Class and the Hidden Curriculum of Work” by Jean Anyon

·         “The Strength of Patience”: 3-page summary of the previous 500 word essay “All You Need is Patience”

·         “Discipline and the Child”: 750+ word argumentative essay on the merits of disciplining children

·         “Prisoner Privileges”: 1000+ word essay arguing whether or not prisoners should receive priviliges while incarcerated

·         “The Argumentative Cartoon”: 1000+ word essay  summarizing Joel Andreas’s cartoon “The War on Terrorism”

·         “The Increase Casualty Rate and the Types of Injuries Soldiers Face”: 500 summary on a visual element that would support thesis for research paper

·         “Social Class and the Economy”: 1000+ essay contrasting “Class in America—2003” by Gregory Mantsios and “Stephen Cruz” by Studs Terkel

·         “Strength, Bravery, and Perseverance”: 1750+ word research paper describing the difficulties soldiers face after becoming amputees and the ways they learn to overcome and have a better quality of life

·         Kept journal blog and completed all 15 lesson entries

Future Goals for Writing

Spring 2012- Degree Completion and Beyond

                                                ·         Complete and pass successfully English F200X

·         Complete and pass successfully a creative writing class

·         Possibly consider a journalism class

·         Write a book

Lesson 14 Journal Entry

*Write about what you wish you had done differently while you worked on your paper.
I am not sure if I would have done anything differently. I know that I would have wished for different circumstances, such as my husband being here so I could devote more time on the paper instead of waiting for my kids to go to bed (laughing) but other than that, I am pretty happy with the way I tackled this paper. I do, however, have one thought that is nagging me in the back of my head, and that is that maybe I should have submitted my paper to the Writing Center along with the two proofreadings from my friends that I did. I am not worried about my content and how I structured my paper. I am more worried about the grammatical and punctuation errors. I have gone through the 20 errors page that I was sent to make sure I have not done any of these, but I am pretty sure I have missed one. Also, I have added more information to my paper after my edits were done so hopefully I added that in error free. Nevertheless, I feel that I have instilled what I needed to in my writing.

Lesson 13 Journal Entry

Whenever I write or do a craft that is personal and will be viewed by a friend, it makes me nervous. Is it any good? What will they think? Are they going to be honest or try not to hurt my feelings? But I still decided to go that route.
My good friend, fellow college student, and army wife Michele Sargent has proofread my research paper. Her suggestions and advice has helped me immensely. I knew that I had some wording issues in some of my sentences but could not figure out how to rework it. She caught the same sentences that I knew didn't sound write. Also, she also advised me to maybe add some more information regarding Walter Reed in my refuting opposition paragraph. There is also a question on punctuation on page 6 that I am going to look at and make sure that it is correct. But over all she said my punctuation and spelling was good and she also didn't see any issues with my comma placement, which I had asked her to watch out for because I know I tend to mess up in that area. She is going to go back over and make sure she didn't miss anything.
The reason why I chose Michele to go over my paper for me is because I trust her input. The thesis for this paper is very close to our hearts. She wanted to read this as soon as I told her my thesis. We have been hit very hard in our unit this deployment and have soldiers with these injuries. With her acting as my audience and with a personal interest in the subject matter, I knew that her input would help tremendously.
I do feel as if I should add a bit more information on some of the supporting elements. Since my thesis is more focused on the experiences of soldiers dealing with amputations, especially their medical care, then more information on their treatment at Walter Reed needs to be put in. I am glad Michele suggested that.  I am also going to go through and see if any other additional supporting details is needed.
I had such limited time that I did not use the Writing Center, and I am a little worried about if I might have missed something or if Michele might have missed something. I am considering sending this to another individual. I would rather email the name but he was my husband's Platoon Leader during deployment before he was injured. Luckily he was not seriously wounded but is now back here at Rear Detachment. He has offered his help with any editing I might need because he does have a bachelor's degree and had done a bunch of research papers. Any offer of help is much appreciated! Hopefully, he will get back with me soon. I have been struggling this last week with my time management so I hope to get this done soon and put the final touches on my final draft for turn in on Friday.
I am also looking forward to any additional comments from my instructor when I turn in my lesson for this week and if Michele has anything else to add. I am also going to send this to my husband to look over but he is really bad at writing so I just want his opinion on the subject matter. Because this subject is such a personal topic I am glad I went with people who are experiencing the same feelings I am, and that they know why I had to pick this topic and write about it.

Lesson 11 Journal Entry

* On your blog, write about your experience summarizing the reading.

My experience in summarizing was a little difficult. It was mostly due to the constant interruptions that have kept my mind from focusing, but I did find it a little difficult to find source articles that I was not going to use. When doing my initial search for sources, I did not find any that I was not going to use by the time I had finished my assignment for Lesson 9, so I had to find sources that were not going to work for my research. I found this also hard to do because all the sources I was finding offered so much information that I could use in my paper. The going through and finding what information I was not going to use and then finding the right articles to do in order to complete the assignment was the most difficult. When I started actually doing the summarizing once I found the sources, it became easier. I used the list of questions to use for annotation in Hacker and used that to get the basis of the summaries of each article. I also used the journalist questions to pinpoint in detail information in the article that was important. The evaluation paragraph at the end, I had to look back in Lesson 3 for and just followed the example written and substituted what I needed to coincide with the three articles. I wish I could have found two longer than three page articles so I would only have to do two summaries, but alas, it was not possible. Hopefully, my summaries are concise and do the job of explaining what I read in each article. I went back through each summary to edit and make sure that I did not quote or take anything directly from the sources, but just paraphrased. I also made sure I cited all the sources in my summary to make sure I gave credit where it was due. I was actually curious about my second article on how to do this because it is a wikipedia source and it took the information off of two articles, one which I had used for my bibliography. Since I was supposed to use one that I didn't use for Lesson 9, I was confused because technically I am using a wikipedia source but I did cite the two articles because wikipedia stated information gathered from them.  Hopefully this still falls into the instructions for this lesson.

Lesson 10 Journal Entry

A 70 year old veteran in Oregon will be served with an eviction notice in his apartment complex if he flies the American Flag on Veteran's Day.
I understand the need to follow rules set forth in the apartment complex lease, however, this is a little ridiculous. The  man served in the Navy, he has mutliple family members who have served. Are we not living in the United States of America. When has flying the American Flag suddenly become the wrong thing to do. Yes, flying of any banners is against the code in the apartment complex, but this is done more to prevent conflicts from rival sports teams. This is Oregon, a state which is part of the United States. Everyone in that apartment complex should be an American. Who is going to complain that flying the American Flag is against their beliefs, and if they do complain, guess what? You are in America. He should be flying that flag everyday but he only flies it on military service days and holidays. The apartment complex even put a crappy flag pole up with a flag that has already turned orange. When will the respect be given for these veterans that have served and fought for us so we can have the rights that we possess. Also, Veteran's Day is a government holiday, out of any day that the American Flag needs to be flown, it should be that day, his day.  This is a day that we put aside our own ideas and opinions and honor and remember those who have fought and served in the military. On all days, we should honor this veteran by allowing him to fly the American Flag on Veteran's Day.

Lesson 9 Journal Entry

*What else do I still need to do?
I still need to read my sources and take more notes, so I can have some more supporting details to bolster my thesis. I also need to organize my sources by using index cards and annotate them correctly. This will ensure a better prepared prewriting session in the next week or so.

* What do I need outside help with?
I will need outside help with my sources. I will need an outside perspective on my thesis to make sure I am not missing an points I can integrate. I will also need help with editing and second opinions on how differently I can phrase a sentence or paragraph. I will also need help with making sure I stay within the same tense and for comma placement and grammatical errors.

*Why am I feeling threatened by this research paper (if you are)? or Why am I feeling confident about this research paper.
I am feeling confident about this research paper because this is something I feel I have a somewhat personal perspective on. People vent about things that upset them in different ways. I remember my mom venting on her fear of Desert Storm by drawing a cartoon about her feelings at the precise moment that the war had started. Now here I am trying to express my feelings on the pain and suffering that our unit has been through during this deployment. I feel for these soldiers so much. This is my outlet and I hope to be able to bring about an understanding to my audience on what these soldiers are enduring. I also hope to further my understand so I can find a way to help.

Lesson 8 Journal Entry #3

Score for Thesis Statement Exercises: 80%
Document attached to Lesson 8.

Lesson 8 Journal Entry #2

*Read any article pertaining to your research topic that contains a visual element (a graphic). Name that article and its author. Explain why the visual is effective or ineffective in swaying your view on the topic. Make it interesting for the reader who does not already know your thesis. Include a URL to find the graphic (or instructions for doing so if you can't link to it).
In a Los Angeles Times article "Long Term Medical Care Extensive for Wounded Soldiers" written by Tony Perry, the image of Marine Lance Cpl Juan Dominquez is very moving. He is a triple amputee that was injured by a roadside bomb while serving in Afghanistan. This visual is very effective for my view on my topic because it is very personal to my life. It is the reality of some soldiers in my husband's platoon. The casualties caused by Improvised Explosive Devices (IEDs) and the number of amputees as a result has increased in the two years. The strength and perserverance of these soldiers as they struggle with the realities of being single, double, and triple amputees inspire me. I hope to write and research this topic to help others have a better understanding of the hardships they go through and the endless courage they have to continue on after experience such terrible injuries.
Image and article can be found at http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/nationworld/2015049677_injuredtroops15.html

Lesson 8 Journal Entry #1

*Preview, read, and annotate any image in the essay "Two Ways a Woman Can Get Hurt";Advertizing and Violence" on pp. 417-441 of ReReading America. What is its strongest argument? Be sure to describe the image, tell what page it is on, and so forth... in a way that a person who is not taking this course can apprecitae its significance.
The strongest argument that the author, Jean Kilbourne, made was for the advertising images for Calvin Klein. The image on p. 436 features a teenage boy wearing daisy duke shorts and sitting on a floor with his legs bent and spread. His underwear can clearly be seen peeking out from the crotch of his shorts. Kilbourne suggested that Calvin Klein purposely does his new clothes campaigns to imitate child exploitation. He profits by getting higher sales, more publicity, and maintain his rebel appearance. He does not think of the repercussions that can result from this and the affect it will have on growning children and their self esteem. I am in agreement. He uses something that is very taboo and immoral to further his business.

Lesson 7 Journal Entry #2

I read and commented on Jasmine's blog, http://icebluerose.blogspot.com

Lesson 7 Journal Entry #1

*Who is the audience for your essay? What is the thesis of essay? Does it include the claim and 3 supporting reasons to make it a strong thesis?The audience for my essay would be taxpayers, federal prison officials, and advocacy groups. They need to be swayed by my view on the treatment of prisoners in the federal prison system. Prisoners should only be given the basic human rights and receive privileges that are geared toward rehabilitation. My supporting reasons include how prisoners are in prison for a reason, because they broke the law. The costs of keeping them in luxuries with amenities that even the basic law-abiding citizen does not recieve for free, and how is expensive toward taxpayers. These points did well to support my thesis.  
*Can the audience be swayed by your claim and reasons? Why or why not? Tell why each reason is strong enoug to sway a person to your way of thinking.
I believe that the audience is swayed by my claim because my reasons support my view. It is expensive to provide unnecessary privileges to people who committed crimes. We, the taxpayers, are the ones keeping them comfortable. They did the crime so now they need to be punished. If rehabilitation can help keep them out of prison and onto a better life then that is the services that need to be provided. I believe my audience will be swayed because they are mostly all taxpayers and law-abiding and can relate to my position.
*What value does each of your sources have to your audience?
The value is that they are either government officials that are trying to change the way things are done in the prison system to alleviate the burden for taxpayers. They are also trying to find the balance between both imprisonment and rehabilitation to benefit all parties involved. Even the opposing sources offer personal experience to back up their claims. However, it still in favor of my view because my audience is not based on prisoners but those who have to pay.

Lesson 6 Journal Entry #4

*Tell the reader of your blog why understanding visual elements is useful to writing arguments.
Visual elements can enhance the views that you are trying to impart on the audience. If you are writing an argument a graphic or picture can help it along and get your points across. Many readers need a better understand of what they are reading. A graphic or picture in an argument can help them understand what emotion or feeling, you as an author, is trying to impart to them. If one word is the forefront to your argument and needs to be singled out from the rest of the writing, then a bold visual element can help. Another example can be a picture that will impart a strong emotion on a particle point that the author is trying to make in order to sway the audience toward his or her view.

Lesson 6 Journal Entry #2

*How do the images on p. 118 relate to current events?
In the last couple of years, the U.S. Military and government have been under attack by many for the abuses of detainees in the Middle East and Guantanamo Bay, Cuba. Torture and the disregard for prisoners' basic human rights have come into question from some Americans and other nations. Soldiers from Abu Ghraib Prison were arrested for their treatment of prisoners and Guantanamo Bay is still in contention of closing by President Obama. Many lawmakers contest the detention of prisoners by the U.S. Military and the way they handle interrogations. Others commend them for being able to get the answers they need to win the war. However, torture and abuse is not susposed to be present during the imprisonment faced by suspected terrorists. Just like any other system, there are always a few bad eggs.

Lesson 6 Journal Entry #1

*Respond to images on p. 118 of Writing Arguments by telling what the argument of each one is. Write a strong thesis statement for each argument. How did you figure out the claim being made? Be sure there is enough information included in the narrative for a reader who has not looked at the cartoon to understand what you are writing about.
Looking at each image individually, they both are completely different. They do not even look to be the same person. It was only when I read the captioning at the bottom that I realized that both images are of John Walker Lindh, convicted Taliban terrorist and traitor. In the first image, while in the Sherriff's custody he is clean cut and appears to be wearing a uniform shirt. The argument that could be made would be the about the treatment of a traitor in civilian custody. Thesis: The treatment of traitors and revoking their constitutional rights. In the second image, imprisoned by the U.S. military, he is strapped naked to a stretcher, blindfolded, cuffed, and very rough in appearance. The argument in this image could be made that the United States treats traitors the same as anyone suspected of terrorism. Thesis: Traitors forfeit their citizen rights and should be detained like any other terrorist.

Lesson 4 Journal Entry #2

*Which of the suggested Tasks from Writing Arguments did you find most helpful in pre-writing your revision? Why?
I had two tasks that helped me tremendously. They were the freewriting and idea mapping. I find that freewriting helps me get everything in my mind out and then I follow-up with the idea
mapping to organize what I did in the freewriting.
*Which genre of argument would you most likely write on your own? Why?
I think that speeches would be the argument that I would most likely like to write on my own. I like to write things that motivate. Especially on things that I feel strongly about.
*Did you ask anyone else to make recommendations about your revising process? Why or why not?
I asked my husband many questions during my writing process when I didn't quite get what I was supposed to be doing. Asking him and also asking my instructor some questions helped me get through and finish my argument.
*Why and how is argument both a process and a product? What is the goal of argument?
It takes many steps to produce a good argument. In order to argue, you need to know what you are arguing about. You also need to put it into a very organized order to get your audience to understand it. Once you achieve that, your argument can catch the attention of your audience and can also sway their way of thinking toward your view. I think that the goal of argument is to present a concise and understandable opinion that can change a view or views of whoever is reading it and cause a change.
*How did previewing sections of a book (rather than simply reading them) help you to understand the material?
It helped me know what to expect and what sections I will need to focus on. It also helped me ask myself questions while I read the section after I previewed it so I can better understand the material.
*Whose blog did you read and leave a comment on? Summarize what you wrote.
I posted on Jeff Bowen's blog. http://jeffbowen-english.blogspot.com/
He talked about the protesting being done at military funerals. I wrote that I too find that upsetting and how I wish that soldiers' families could be left to grieve in peace.

Lesson 6 Journal Entry #3

Find another graphic, commercial, or video to analyze. Report on the argument being made. Attach a copy of the graphic element or explain how to find or view the graphic. Write a strong thesis statement for this argument.

When viewing this image of Lady Liberty, the American flag, the U.S. Constitution, and the Fallen Soldier Memorial, think on the sacrifices that soldiers are making far from home. They are away from their loved ones, their home, and even from the culture of being an American. They fight, live, breathe, and die on foreign soil, but forever in their hearts and minds is the image of liberty and freedom that the American way of life was founded. That is what they fight and die and that is they are memorialized.
This image can be found at  <http.www.stambrosechurchri.org/2010/11/15/a-prayer-for-a-fallen-soldier/>.
There is a reason why the United States has an Independence Day. To remember those who fought for freedom from tyranny and oppression. Today, American soldiers fight for the same thing, sacrificing their lives for the freedom from tyranny and oppression of others in foreign lands. Regardless of how the public feels about the reasons for Iraq and Afghanistan, one constant remains the same, the sacrifices of U.S. soldiers.

Lesson 5 Journal Entry

Is anyone else having a problem with starting on a lesson? I know that I have been having a difficulty in comprehending what is required for writing either the essay or argument. I do not know if it is because I have not been in school for a while and I just have to get used to doing essays again, or that my brain has finally decided to quit on me....lol.
I have found the freewriting and idea mapping techniques very useful. I like the way I can just ramble on in the freewriting and I can come up with ideas that I would not have come up with doing any other technique. I also like the idea mapping because it helps me see graphically what I am thinking, and helps me structure my essay better. The journalist questions are also a technique that I have done that has helped me. When I think up a Who, What, When, Where, Why, or How question, it helps me to put it into a search engine and I can search sites that fall withing my subject line. However, I do not like to do the believing and doubting game. I find it hard to start my thinking process for this and end up getting lost in my own thoughts.

*What have you learned about the writing process and/or about yourself during this lesson?
I learned that I am getting better at prewriting. I am also learning and understanding more of all the steps that need to be done to finish a lesson. The thing that I have learned about myself is that I needed to concentrate more on my writing and focusing on my formatting. I still have some more learning to do.
*What have you learned about the textbooks we are using for this course?
I find that the Writers Reference is very helpful with all the different formats and citing that I need to learn. I also find that I have learned a lot about how to argue and the structuring of an argument that I never would have thought about from Writing Arguments.
*What have you learned about your instructor's expectations of you?
I learned that she expects me to learn from my mistakes and correct them. I have also learned that she expects me to make a mistake on something that we haven't gone over and that she explains in the grading what I did wrong so I can fix it in the next lesson.
*Comment on any problems you had with outlining.
The only problems I had was figuring out which outline to do with each thesis. I had to swap some  around to make sure the outline I was using worked with the information.

Lesson 4 Journal Entry #1

Evaluating Lesson 4 Essay
The supporting evidence in the revised claim "The Strength of Patience" is very convincing. One source's facts are convincing because she has the experience of practicing patience for a living. Her many years as a military wife and her work experience gives credibility to her statements. She uses patience in every aspect of her life. The other source's facts are also convincing because the source tells of "How To Be Patient" and gives pointers on using paitence for a living. These source also point out on the difficulty of utilizing this characteristic in a person's life.

Lesson 3 Journal Entry

Write about a current controversy in the news. It can be local, national, or international in scope. Be sure to answer the journalist's questions about the topic and then discuss the issue.

The withdrawal of troops out of the Middle East.
President Obama released a State of the Union address about two months ago stating his intention for the early withdrawal of U.S. troops out of Afghanistan. He further states that the withdrawal will start with 10,000 troops coming home by next summer and the remaining troops out by 2014. The mounting cost of the war, loss of lives, and the fact that we have been there too long with only recent progress has been factors in his decision.
I am torn on this issue. I feel both sides very heavily. I am happy and relieved that our guys and gals are coming home but I am also worried about the repercussions of leaving too soon. This issue hits too close to home because I am an Army Wife. I have been one for over ten years and its been a long ten years. Many deployments and many nights of wondering if my husband was going to make it home. He is currently home on RnR from a deployment right now and I am so happy that for a while I can sleep stress free. At least until  he has to leave and finish his tour.
With the cost of the war increasing, the threats of not receiving a paycheck is a major concern for our continued stay in the Middle East. We have only recently seen real progress with the capture and death of Osama bin Laden. Along with that is the list of casualties growing. But what if we leave too soon and suddenly have another war or terrorist plot on our hands, one that actually succeeds again. This is what tears me is the fact of not knowing if this is going to affect us worse in the future.
It also breaks my heart that if we stay longer, the loss grows. I am on the knowing end of that casualty list, I have had to call down and do notifications. Recently in fact, and I know that I will have to do some more. It hurts knowing that even though you are happy that your loved one is safe, someone else's didnt make it and that guilt piles on you. Can bringing the soldiers home early save even one person from going through that? Yes, but will it save another from something worse in the future? I know that this decision was a hard one for the President to make, and God only knows what the results will be. Pray and thank our soldiers, they do so much for so little.